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Why is it so difficult to maintain relationships these days? The divorce rate continues to rise, more people than ever are single, yet most are still looking for their dream relationship. Once they find it with someone who seems so perfect, it often soon becomes their worst nightmare! What causes this and how can it be prevented?
I believe that the main cause of relationship failure is a rampant "virus", few know about that I call “Relationship Sabotagosis.”
This, in effect, causes a relationship to be doomed from the start! There are a number of varieties of this bug, but I will list only 5 of the primary ones in this blog.
“Relationship Overlaposis” – In other words, beginning a new relationship, while still in an old one. You haven’t formally broken up yet, but you rationalize by saying, “It’s been dead for years anyway!”
SYMPTOMS include: chronic confusion of partners, denial of your own part in why the old relationship died, and others.
SIDE EFFECTS include relapse of previous relationship issues, arguing, blaming, withdrawing, avoiding.
PROGNOSIS: Often terminal, with most Overlaposis Relationships succumbing within 2 years.
PREVENTION includes clearly and formally terminating one relationship prior to beginning a new one or even better, working on the current relationship so it improves. Perhaps participate in therapy or attending workshops and reading about relationships to determine what you contributed to the problems that caused the relationship to end.
Please check back often to read about the other 4 Viruses affecting relationships!
Carol A. Anderson, MFT is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who specializes in both helping Singles find their Dream Relationship and helping Couples create it. To learn more about Carol, please visit her website at http://acenter4growth.com